Update of sorts

Fireside - 
So I totally used the video and it was a big hit.  :D  I felt impressed to talk about stuff people don't usually talk about with Mission Prep.  Namely; depression and other mental health issues on the mission.  I had at least one companion affected by it and I knew of so many more Elders and Sisters who faced major depression because of the unique stresses and pressures of a mission.  My companion got help before it spiraled down too much and before I even became her companion but quite a few missionaries don't recognize the symptoms or are ashamed to get help.  The idea that being righteous and following rules should be enough is erroneous and quite dangerous.  Mental illness is something that can and will happen to people through no fault of their own.  I hope that the youth who heard me speak were able to take that to heart and will be in a position to help themselves or others who struggle on their mission.  





Lent Project - 

Now that April is halfway over I thought I would give an update on my Lent Project - bra drive for Free The Girls. Thanks to some really awesome people who I also count as friends I collected two large bags full of bras. Soon they will make their way to Mozambique and will be sold by girls and women who were victims of human trafficking.  http://freethegirls.org/






Family Visit-
Youngest Sister (Holly) came to visit for her Spring break and we had a fun whirlwind of a time.  Philly, NYC with the MacMuis (Ben got to come too) and Amish/Chocolate country.  Then, of course, I got majorly sick so we spent her last day here watching movies and relaxing.  More updates and photos to come.

Appropriate or Not??

So I kinda wanna use this video for the fireside talk I am giving on mission prep this Sunday.  It is central to my theme "O be wise; what can I say more" from Jacob 6:12 but I want to know if it is appropriate.  Well, basically I want validating that it is appropriate for me to use in a fireside setting (not in the chapel.)  k, thanks!

Substitute teacher story - the school of last resort

So a bit ago I got to substitute at what I will call the school of last resort.  Last year it seemed like I was always there (had to cover for a teacher with a serious injury for about a month) but this year my assignments have kept me mostly at the normal high/middle schools.

This school is for the kids that have gotten kicked out of their elementary school for violence, and serious defiance of all authority.  The kids backpacks gets searched as they come in and they are also checked with a metal detector wand.  It is a tough love kind of school with extremely small class sizes.  It is one of the hardest assignments I tackle even though I am dealing with virtual babies (we are talking 7 year olds).

This time I was assigned to a class where I had never been before and I didn't have a relationship with any of the students.  There was a para educator in there with me to help for which I was very grateful. The day started out well enough until one of the students completely broke down and started crying.  For what?  Well, I still don't know.  Luckily we were able to move past it and later on I found out that this student was essential ignored at home and the only way they could get any attention was to throw a complete fit.  At home, this was the only way they would get the essentials (like being fed) and it translated to this student throwing a fit at school for any reason.  The teachers, counselors had been working with this student and they had gotten to the point when he/she was able to ask for help rather than break down but having a entirely new teacher in the classroom (me) caused some major regression.  I think I witnessed at least 3 more fits.

This student was not the only student whose difficulties at home resulted in their poor behavior/learning.  One student had to get his/her younger siblings up and ready for the day because most like their parent was too drunk or high to do it themselves.  Another student had so much aggression in him/or her that they spent a good 20 minutes of their gym time pounding a tumbling mat.  This particular student was one of the many in foster care due to abuse at home.  And the tragic back story of these students go on and on and on.

I was telling B about this day I had with these 'special' students and I broke down a bit.  We ended up talking about the day to come where all of us will return to meet our Maker and be judged.  We both wondered just how responsible these lovely but broken kids are for their own actions after being raised in such hellish circumstances.  How responsible are they for where life takes them after having such a rough start? I know there are people (like my own Dad) who have been able to not repeat the cycle of abuse but in most instances it proves too difficult to break out of.  So I ask you, my few readers to give me your wise insights on this.

1 Nephi 11:16-17
"And he said unto me: Knowest thou the condescension of God? And I said unto him: I know that he loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things.  

I dream of lasik... and a picture of the first flower of spring.

I dream of lasik like some people dream about Hawaiian vacations, new cars or weight loss.  If you are as near sighted as I am (-8.5 in contact lens prescription) and if you have been this near sighted for 20 years like I have been (my prescription hasn't changed since I was 11) than you too would dream of waking up being able to see your handsome husband in bed next to you.   In order for me to properly see him I have to get inches from his face and then my perspective only allows me to take in parts of him at a time.  I think it alternately freaks him out and makes him laugh.

Also I think (because of my eyesight, not my lack of grace) I have stubbed my toe more times in one year than B has in his whole life.  I have the broken but healed weird angle toes to prove it.

Recently we found out both of my eyes had either retinal tears or holes in them and I got them fixed.  Most of the literature I had read about retinal holes and tears had told me that I would not be a candidate for lasik.  Too many problems.... possible retinal detachment.... blindness yadayadaydada.  My dreams were dashed!  Until I stopped relying upon the Internet and pamphlets and actually asked my retinal specialist doctor.  "Yeah, you can still have lasik.  Now that we have fixed these problems you are going to be an excellent candidate." then he expounded upon how much it would change my life.  He was really preaching to the choir on that account and I was elated!  It is still going to me some years of saving/planning before I can get it but once day I will be able to wake up and see my husband/future children without searching for my glasses or stumbling to the bathroom to put in contacts.

Other dreams of my future life after lasik

- traveling without contact solution that always seems to get all over my bags.  Yeah, I know I could just wear glasses but you know your peripheral vision?  It is kinda important and your glasses don't do anything to correct it.  Which means I sometimes end up with headaches.  Plus I am vain, and have you seen me with my coke bottle glasses? On the same note, being able to whisk ourselves away on trips with out my checklist of things I need for my eye.  Special contact case, extra contacts, glasses, cleaner, eye drops, solution (2 kinds).  I

- No more random contact lens searches.  When I was younger and still growing my eyesight got so poor so quickly that my OD put me in gas permeable contacts.  I was 11.  So many times in my teenage years my friends and I were on hands and knees trying to find the contact that had just popped out of my eyeball.  Those things were almost 60 bucks a pop!  Soft contacts were a revelation but you still have to search for them every once in a while.

- Waking up in the middle of the night and not stubbing my toe on the way to the bathroom.  Ok, I might still stub my toe but hopefully with less frequency because I will be able to see on my way to the bathroom.


That is all I can think of for now... but here is the first flower of spring!  (at least in my front yard)  Ignore the weeding I need to do around the crocus and just enjoy the promise that warmer weather is coming.

Valentimmmmes and pet names

I can be a hard person to shop for on romantic occasions.  I think that most men automatically think jewelry for anniversaries/valentines/christmas but since I don't really wear jewelry except earrings and a wedding band B has to get a bit more creative. **

Plants, chocolate, useful household items are a hit for me but what I love most of all is thoughtful gifts. Plus I don't want him to spend tons of money on me.  So B did something pretty cute and got me personalized m & m's for valentines this year.  If you look closely you can see a picture of us from our wedding day and the phrases "I love you" and "best friends".  

"I love you" is obvious enough but "best friends" comes from one a sleepy Saturday morning conversation we had when we were newly married.   Well, I was sleepy.  B made breakfast and came to wake me up when I said that I loved him and he is my best friend.  Now that I think about it it, the phrase totally reminds me of elementary school.  He started saying "your my best friend" back to me and it has become our sort of pet name/phrase.  At least it is one of the ones that we are not ashamed of.

Experiment in Green Thumbmanship - results!

Success!  Now if it would just warm up enough for the ones I planted outside to grow.

Lent Project - Free the girls

So I found myself in kind of a rut during the last few months after miscarrying right over Christmas.  A bit of a pity party/ selfish rut.  So I decided to use Lent to do something about it.  Usually during Lent people give up something to bring them closer to Christ but I wanted to actively do something to help me better emulate his love and charity.

I found this charity through the CNN Freedom Project (which is amazing btw) and I decided to do my very own bra drive.  http://freethegirls.org/

They collect bras to be sold by women and girls who have been rescued from slave trafficking in Mozambique Africa.  Why Bras?  Here is the answer from their website.  "Let’s face it, ladies: the back of your underwear drawer is most likely a graveyard of bras you don’t wear anymore or that never fit right in the first place. By contrast, second-hand clothing is a profitable market in many countries around the world. Bras are sought after items. Some of the girls in our program are making 5x the minimum wage in their community by selling bras! And even better, bras provide an opportunity for these women to work with other women, since they have a history of being abused and used by men."

It is very humbling to realize that my problems (the spinach is all gone at Costco!!) are such 1st world problems and that there are so many of Gods Children who suffer in ways I cannot fathom.  I had to help somehow.So far I have collected one large bag of bras and I hope to collect more and perhaps a bit of money by my end of Lent March 30th deadline.

Any help would be awesome or you could share the info about this.  Or just educated yourself about modern day slavery... it exists even here in the US.